DEMYSTIFYING HIJAAB, UNDERSTANDING IT’S HISTORY, CONCEPT AND CELEBRATING IT AWESOMNESS! :)

“Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty: that will make for greater purity for them: and God is well acquainted with all that they do.” This is the first aspect of Hijab in Islam! Before even the dress aspect- LOWER YOUR GAZE! Lowering your gaze will restrict your thoughts from wandering into the unholy, which is the second part of this concept of hijab- your thoughts, your behaviour (body language, verbal insinuations-flirting etc) these are all very important and forgotten asects of Hijab, just a veil on your head (girls) or a cover over your navel (boys) is not hijab in it's totality!

Now- AS USUAL I WILL START OFF TOPIC (NOT SO MUCH THIS TIME) AND WITH MY USUAL CONTROVERSIAL KICK START! We need to remember that even in the West, in the start women dressed very decently. Long dresses/skirts, long coats and would cover their hair when they leave the house. They were also very proud housewives; cooking/cooking clubs, cleaning/house wife clubs, doing homework with the kids etc. They felt no need to compete or become a man! So todays western war against the covering of Muslim women and our defense of it is NOT only our view of how things should be it existed in the history of the west until very recently! In the words of Nobel Peace prize winner Tawakkol Karman "The human being in early times was almost naked, with the development of his thought over time he began to wear clothes. What I am today and what I wear (full hijab) Is the height of intellect and sophistication reached by man through the ages, not backwardness. Unclothedness (-as seen today) is a sign of backwardness and human thinking going back to early times (the primitive)".

AND THEN the feminist “revolution” took place- women screaming and chanting WE WANT RIGHTS, (WOMEN IN ISLAM DIDN’T NEED TO DO THAT- THEY WERE GIVEN RIGHTS OVER 1400 YEARS AGO FROM ALLAH AND NOT MANKIND AS THESE WOMEN WERE ASKING FOR) WE CAN DO WHAT MEN CAN DO, WE DEMAND AN OPINION (ISLAM GAVE WOMEN OPINIONS OVER 1400 YEARS AGO) STOP VIOLENCE AGAINST WOMEN, STOP MARGINALIZING WOMEN, STOP FORCING US TO DO THINGS WE DON’T WANT, ALLOW US TO INHERIT AND BUY AND SELL (YA ALLAH THE ALMIGHTY WITH HIS OWN WORDS DECREED ALL THIS FOR EVERY MUSLIM WOMAN THROUGH THE QURAN OVER 1400 YEARS AGO!) Where as the western women felt they needed to fight the men for their rights and be ALLOWED these same rights by these very same men, muslim women were sitting pretty knowing very well that their creator gave them these rights over 1400 years ago, no man (creation) was allowed to give it to them or take them away- they are in the Quran the very word of God! In an attempt to BEG for rights from mere mortals- in their very own ignorance the west strayed away from religion/culture- after all, how could they sustain religion if they give and take rights and laws within themselves laws that were lacking even in the very religions they once practiced-  christianity/judaism/hinduism etc)

Today after the revolution, the western woman feels she needs to show off her breasts/legs etc etc just to get noticed in the “business world” thus posing naked on a car and even milk advert whereas then most successful men are fully dressed and seated behind a desk doing an honest un-demeaning job! He does not need to flash his *beep* (insert genital name) or lift a leg up a pole to sell something or convince someone. Does she think she won? Does she dare to imagine that she is now more superior to the covered/modest jewels (women) of Islam? SUBHANALLAH!

Surah Isra 17:97:
"It is he whom Allah guides, that is on true Guidance; but he whom He leaves astray - for such wilt thou find no protector besides Him. On the Day of Judgment We shall gather, them together, prone on their faces, blind, dumb, and deaf: their abode will be Hell: every time it shows abatement, We shall increase from them the fierceness of the Fire."

The basic elements of Hijab:

Women:

The material must not be so thin that one can see through it.

The clothing must hang loose so that the shape of the body is not apparent.

The female clothing must not resemble the man's clothing.

The design of the clothing must not resemble the clothing of the non-believing women.

The design must not consist of bold designs which attract attention.

Clothing should not be worn for the sole purpose of gaining reputation or increasing one's status in society.

Men:

Men should fully cover his 'awrah.

Men's clothes should be loose enough so as not to describe what he is covering (his 'awrah).

They should be thick enough so as not to describe the color of the skin or the parts required to be covered.

They should not be designed in a way to attract attention. The basic rule of modesty and avoiding "show off" applies to all believers’ men and women.

I KNOW GIRLS/BOYS (Especially girls), MANY OF YOU ARE THINKING THIS IS TOUGHT! BUT REMEMBER DUNYIA IS JUST A PASSING “PHASE” OUR PREFFERED DESTINATION IS JANNAH! ALWAYS ALSO REMEMBER THIS HADITH:

“The world is a prison for the believer and a paradise for the non-believer” Tirmidhi and Muslim.

More reassuring hadiths and HQ verses:

“And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their zeenah (charms, or beauty and ornaments) except what (must ordinarily) appear thereof; that they should draw their khimar (veils) over their bosoms and not display their zeenah except to their husbands, their fathers .... and that they should not strike their feet so as to draw attention to their hidden zeenah (ornaments). (24:31-32)”

“O Prophet! Tell your wives and daughters and the believing women that they should draw over themselves their jilbab (outer garments) (when in public); this will be more conducive to their being recognized (as decent women) and not harassed. But God is indeed oft-forgiving, most merciful. (33:59)”

“And know that women advanced in years, who no longer feel any sexual desire incur no sin if they discard their thiyab (outer garments), provided they do not aim at a showy display of their zeenah (charms or beauty). But it is better for them to abstain (from this); and God is all-hearing, all-knowing. (24:60)”

“O you Children of Adam! We have bestowed libasan (clothing or raiment) on you to cover your nakedness and as a thing of beauty. But the raiment of righteousness (taqwa), that is the best. Such are the signs of God, that they may receive admonition. (7:26)”

“O Children of Adam! Wear your beautiful apparel (zeenah) at every time and place of prayer: eat and drink: but waste not by excess, for God loves not the wasters. (7:31)”

HIJAAB DO'S AND DON'TS (many will totally hate whaat they'll read, many already know- but there is no room to tailor fit this already perfect religion to suit the desires of mankind):

Tight/transparent clothes: eg. Tights, Skinny jeans etc	And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their zeenah (charms, or beauty and ornaments) except what (must ordinarily) appear thereof; that they should draw their khimar (veils) over their bosoms and not display their zeenah except to their husbands, their fathers .... and that they should not strike their feet so as to draw attention to their hidden zeenah (ornaments). (24:31-32) Hadith: ". . . If the woman reaches the age of puberty. No part of her body should be seen but this - and he pointed to his face and hands."
Fashion	Hadith: "Whoever wears a dress of fame in this world; Allah will clothe him with a dress of humiliation inthe day of resurrection, then set it afire." Hadith “A man who copies a dress, is of that nation!” Meaning if you do like the west does that you are of that nations, a nation that allows homosexuality, zinnah, icest, drugs, alcohol, devil worship etc etc
Wearing Perfume	Abu Moosa al-Ash’ari said: the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Any woman who puts on perfume then passes by people so that they can smell her fragrance, is an adulteress.” Zaynab al-Thaqafiyyah reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If any one of you (women) goes out to the mosque, let her not touch any perfume.” Abu Hurayrah said: the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Any woman who has scented herself with bakhoor (incense), let her not attend ‘Ishaa’ prayers with us.” By the way, we recently read that biologists have discovered a sexual gland in the nose, i.e., there is a direct connection between the sense of smell and the provocation of desire. If they agree on this then this will be yet another miracle of Isslam having made the use of perfume in public haram so as to curb triggering sexual desire.
Shaping of eyebrows	the Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) cursed the woman who plucks her eyebrows and the one who has that done, but it is permissible for a woman to remove a beard or moustache, if one grows, or hair from her legs or arms.” al-Bukhaari and Muslim
Wearing make up	“…and not to reveal their adornment except to their husbands…” [al-Noor 24:31] Remember girls, you cant wear tight clothes or perfume so as NOT to attract strange men and so what else does make up do if not make us look attractive to the non muhram as well?
High heels/peep toes/ stilettos!	Again, apply in this situation the ayahs and hadith in regard to tight dress, make up, fashion and perfume! Remember the noise from the high heels attracts the attention and thus mind-wandering of the opposite sex.
Nail polish	HARAM! Main point to remember is, you can’t pray with this enamel coating since wudhu does not complete. And wearing it when on your period remember the hadith- “a man who copies a dress, is of that nation!” Meaning if you do like the kafir does; that you are of that nation, a nation that allows homosexuality, zinnah, incest, drugs, alcohol, devil worship etc.

HAYAA- A forgotten yet integral part of our being as muslims.

A thought provoking topic on its own, May Allah lead us back on the right path ameen; and a follow up of the previous blog as well.

#2. Part b): What is hayaa and how does it help in our daily life/routine?? 

HAYA: “Conscious or unconscious mechanism whereby unacceptable impulses are suppressed."

Background

Haya' can be translated as: modesty, shame, shyness or bashfulness.

The word haya' is derived from the word "al-hayah", which means life, as if the person who has no haya' (modesty) is like a dead person, has no life!

Islam encourages and treasures al-haya' or modesty. It is one of the most important characteristics that each and every Muslim should acquire and posses.

The following are some hadiths which emphasize this great quality:

"Haya' (modesty) and Iman (faith) are two that go together. If one is lifted, the other is also lifted."
[Recorded by al-Hakim]

"Al-Haya' is part of Iman."

"Haya' does not produce but goodness."
[Recorded by al-Bukhari and Muslim]

"Among the things that people have found from the words of the previous prophets was: 'If you feel no shame, then do as you wish.'" bukhari

So basically:

 If you have no modesty, then you have the audacity and guts do whatever you wish despite the angels and Allah watching you and Allah will punish you for what you do.

This mode of expression is well known in the Arabic language, and it is used for threatening someone. This mode is used by the Qur'an in Surah Fussilat: ayat 40.

“Surely they who deviate from the right way concerning Our communications are not hidden from Us. What! is he then who is cast into the fire better, or he who comes safe on the day of resurrection? Do what you like, surely He sees what you do.”

Haya' is one of the most important factors that keeps a person from committing a sinful act. If a person has no haya', he/she will do almost anything.

---

lessons

There are two aspects of haya' : Natural haya' and acquired haya'. The later is attained as a result of knowing and realizing the Glory of Allah and His attributes.

There are many manifestations of haya':

• Having haya' towards Allah - a Muslim should feel ashamed to have Allah see him doing - or hear him saying - something that displeases Allah, especially when that Muslim is alone and out of the view of humankind.
• Haya' towards the angels - as they are noble and dignified creatures who witness the acts performed by humans.
• Haya' towards other humans - an essential characteristic that keeps people from harming one another and from performing indecent acts.
• Haya' towards the person him/herself - a person should be ashamed of him/herself when he/she performs acts that are shameful. If he/she notices that his/her haya' level is low he/she should improve it by remembrance of Allah, getting closer to Him, and fearing Him.

This great concept of haya' or modesty should be promoted through all possible means and at all levels and by everyone: educators, teachers, lecturers, parents, and du'at (preachers). It is unfortunate that today, and because of technology misuse, this great concept is threatened. Hence there is greater responsibility for the Muslim du'at, parents, educators, etc. to shoulder. The evildoers are promoting anything that distorts and corrupts haya'. Those people are taking advantage of the system where technology advancement is double sided.

EG, THE MEDIA, especially where it is entertainment oriented. Entertainment is taking new destructive directions which negatively affect the concept of haya' a great deal. If haya' is distorted, iman (faith) can be distorted too. The chances of committing sins and evil will be higher, and the chances of delaying or neglecting obligations will be higher as well. Even chances of committing crimes will be higher due to these new directions of entertainment, where crime, drug addiction, distrustful acts, and adultery are all looked at as means of entertainment. Semi naked bodies, songs that promote evil, fashion etc. are aspects of new entertainment. Unfortunately, we Muslims borrow media material from the West without any kind of evaluation, filtering or classification. More instructions and guidelines are needed from media organisers regarding the nature of movies and TV. There should be programs for families' awareness.

Haya' can sometimes be abused as a justification for not doing something or giving up an obligatory act. For example, being silent or passive in the presence of falsehood or oppression for no reason except claiming haya'. Or using haya' as an excuse for not encouraging good or discouraging evil. Unless, for both of the above mentioned cases, there is another good reason for not doing these acts such as considering the most likely expected harmful consequences.

Another example of abusing haya' is to use it as an excuse for not seeking knowledge. In many Muslim cultures this matter is confused and misunderstood where there is a proverb or cliché that says: "There is no modesty in asking questions in religious matters". But this cliché is only practiced in a few certain sensitive issues. However when it comes to seeking knowledge in a classroom, the situation is different. Most Muslims become shy and use modesty as an excuse. Parents at home, teachers at school, even lecturers at Universities add to the problem where they may treat asking questions as a sign of not being modest. This attitude needs to be changed to the right, positive one.

Another example is using haya' as an excuse for not doing what is correct and allowed. You know that something should be done and it is good and allowed or is even a recommended or obligatory act. However, you simply give up and do not do it because of a claimed haya'. Not giving sadaqah (charity) to a needy in front of others, not taking away a harmful material from the street or the path of the Muslims, or not helping or giving a hand to a disabled or an elderly person to cross the street are some good examples of this phenomenon.

“Every deen has an intimate character and the character of Islam is hayaa” Hadith

“When lewdness is part of anything is becomes defective; and when haya is a part of anything, it becomes beautiful!” Tirmidhi

“There are more than 70 branches of Iman (Faith). The foremost is the declaration that there is no god except Allah and the least of it is removing harmful things from the path. And haya is a branch of Iman." [Bukhari, Muslim].

Islam's laws about hijab, its ban against free mixing of men and women, its teachings about gender-relations --- all of these reflect a deep concern for haya.

There is a moving story from the earlier Islamic period about a woman who learnt that her young son had been lost in a battle. She ran in a panic to confirm the news, but before that she took time to make sure that she covered herself fully in accordance with the newly revealed laws of hijab. She was asked how did she manage to do that in a time of great personal tragedy. She replied: "I have lost my son, but I did not lose my haya."

Although I would love you to and would urge you to share this information with family and friends, I more strongly wish and urge you to share this specific blog with loved ones. Hayaa will restore peace, humiliation, morals etc on a massive scale.

Stay with me people.... :)

#1 BOY GIRL RELATIONSHIPS- Islam's perspective. Part a.

WOW, it seems like ages since I blogged (it has been agaes) But this life took another turn since!

So, from late last year, I decided to start participating in darsahs- mainly speaking in darsahs that I would hold with they younger genetration. I decided to involve them from the start, have them select what they want to be taught about. The response was spectacular and much more positive then i ever anticipated. I killed the typical "darsah is too boring coz we hear an old ladies thought" notion with the approach of a "young" presenter (yours truly) talking to them, this created the reaction I was hoping for- the excitement before every talk, the enthusiasm and the interaction is great! They are part of it, they feel i can relate more to the issues affecting them today. My closest friends and hosts every Sunday from 9-11 AM- STATE HOUSE GIRLS SCHOOL Nairobi.

The next series of blogs are made up of the presentations I shared with them on their topics of choice. I'm sure any reader, muslim or non-muslim, young or old and also/especially parents with teenage kids will learn a thing or two from these write ups and will agree that their choice of topics was well thought out in regards to our current state/environment.

In order to grasp the understanding of prohibition of boy girl relationships in Islam, we have to begin with understanding of adultery.

#1 Part a) BOY GIRL RELATIONSHIPS- Islam's perspective

Concept of Adultery in Islam

Adultery is a crime not against one person but against the whole of society. For the unmarried, it is a poisoning/deteriorating of the society and the acceptance and invitation of satan to our lives. It affects younger brothers and sisters, the mood and harmony of a family/home, the respect and dignity of a family/generation/religion, disobedience to Allah. It is a violation of a marital contract. 50% of all first time marriages world wide result in divorce within two years and the main reason for divorce are the adultery of one of the partners. Adultery, which includes both pre-marital and extra marital relationships, is an epidemic in this society. Nobody seems to listen to the Bible, which says frequently, "Thou shall not commit adultery." The Quranic approach is, "Do not approach adultery."

Does it mean that not only is illegal sex prohibited, but also anything that leads to illegal sex is also illegal? NO; adultery include: dating, free mixing of the sexes, provocative dress, nudity, obscenity, and pornography. The dress code both for men and women is to protect them from temptation and desires by on lookers who may lose self-control and fall into sin. "Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that will make for greater purity, and God is well acquainted with all they do. And say to the believing woman that they should lower their gaze, and guard their modesty."(Quran 24:30-3 1)

"Do not go near to adultery. Surely it is a shameful deed and evil, opening roads (to other evils)" (Quran 17:32).

"Say, 'Verily, my Lord has prohibited the shameful deeds, be it open or secret, sins and trespasses against the truth and reason"' ( Quran 7:33).

"Women impure are for men impure, and men impure are for women impure and women of purity are for men of purity, and men of purity are for women of purity." (Quran 24:26)

Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) has said in many places that adultery is one of the three major sins. The most interesting story is that of a young man who went to the Prophet. This man asked for permission to fornicate because he could not control himself. The Prophet dealt with him with reasoning and asked him if he would approve of someone else having illegal sex with his mother, sister, daughter, or wife. Each time the man said 'no'. Then the Prophet replied that the woman with whom you plan to have sex is also somebody's mother, sister, daughter, or wife. The man understood and repented. The Prophet prayed for his forgiveness.

Ibn Masoud (r.a.a) related that Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w) said, "The blood of a Muslim may not be legally spilt other than in one of three instances: the married person who commits adultery, a life for a life, and one who forsakes his religion and abandons the community." [Bukhari and Muslim]. In other words, the married person who commits adultery is to be killed by stoning to death [Muslim]. But what about the unmarried person who has sexual relationships? Rest assured that this person will not go unpunished - he or she is to be caned or whipped one hundred times [Muslim]. Even in the Hereafter, the punishment is severe: the Prophet (s.a.w) saw adulterers, men and women, in a baking oven in Hellfire [Bukhari].

Abu Hurairah (r.a.a) narrated that Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w) said that among the seven persons whom Allah will shade in His Shade on the Day (of Judgement) when there is no shade except His Shade, is a man/woman who is tempted by a beautiful man/woman and refuses to respond for fear of Allah. [Bukhari and Muslim].
How do we deal wth this in today’s society?

We must:

1. Not freely mix with the opposite sex.

2. Not to look at the opposite sex. This is done by lowering or averting their eyes as Allah tells us: "Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and to protect their private parts. That is purer for them. Verily Allah is All-Aware of what they do. And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and protect their private parts..." [24:30-31] Furthermore, Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w) said, "...do not let a second look follow the first. The first look is allowed to you but not the second." [Ahmad, Abu Dawood, at-Tirmidhi]. What this means is that the first look is by accident. If this happens then do not take a second look. Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w) also said that the eyes also commit adultery by looking at someone with lust. [Bukhari]

3. For girls, do not make your voices seductive or sweet in front of non-mahram. This is done by lowering the voice and not flirting. As Allah tells the wives of Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w) "...do not be too pleasant of speech, lest one in whose heart there is a disease should feel desire for you..." [33:32]

4. Last but not least, wear appropriate clothing so as not to draw attention to yourselves. That is, girls should wear Hijabs and loose clothing while boys should also wear loose clothing, not the tight jeans or pants with T-shirt tucked in. It is sad that, often, parents allow their children to wear the so called fashion clothing which, in most cases, do not meet the requirement of acceptable Islamic dress code. What is even sadder is to see Muslim mothers covering themselves properly walking with their uncovered teenage daughters and sons.

5. It is important that we start learning to feel modesty, especially around the opposite sex. Regarding shyness, we should use the Prophet (s.a.w) as an example: Abu Said Al Khudri (r.a.a) reported that the Prophet (s.a.w) was more shy than a virgin in her own room. [Bukhari] If we instill this into them at an early age then, Insha' Allah, whenever they are near the vicinity of the opposite sex, they will feel shy and, therefore, will not act inappropriately. It is also important that we keep the communication channels open with our children so that we can talk and explain to them things, and they can ask us questions, without any party feeling embarrassed. Then, when they are older, and with help from us, they will begin to understand why it is that there cannot be a thing called 'the girlfriend-boyfriend relationship'. This is the concept of Hayaa!! We will get back to this later on!

HOW TO ISLAMICALLY HANDLE A SITUATION THAT HAS ALREADY BEEN CREATED (boy and girl have fallen in love)

Firstly remember, when you are ready to be in a relationship or ready to explore feelings and desires (whatever they may be) with the opposite sex then, you are ready for marriage! If you feel you’re too young and cannot get married yet, then you back off from any desire and continue with your studies. We have been told once one is ready for marriage- maturity, then he/she should get married and if he cannot for whatever reason, then he should observe saum.
QUESTION: So how do a boy and girl meet if Islamically they are not to mix freely?

If A boy likes a girl and shows it, maybe writes her a letter or signals her or sends someone to tell her- if the girl likes him back the Islamic thing to do is for the boys family to approach the girls family, make his intentions clear and ask to see her. After parents have discussed this (Islamically we need to remember forced marriages and denying love relationships are not right, however youth are urged to listen to their elders for they know best) the couple will then either get engaged or be allowed to meet with a chaperons (normally an elderly family member or elder siblings) after getting to know each other an agreement can be made to marry, the prophet always said “the best thing that can come out of people love is marriage”

By now we have realized that there is absolutely NO space in Islam for pre-marital or extra marital relationships and so IT IS HARAAM!

Follow part b) Hayaa, for a continuation of this blog.